I met my husband Adam in baptism class. Yes that's right. In baptism class. Obviously I don't remember that moment, but we "met" again in 5th grade. I still don't remember that, but I do remember our years in Middle School together. He was an outgoing leader who liked to pick on me a lot. He wasn't my favorite person because his confidence made me nervous.
In 8th grade he was not at all on my radar. Until one day my friend passed me a note in study hall (keep in mind that we are only 14) that said "Adam thinks you're cute." In my mind I replied with OH MY GOD I LOVE HIM! But I kept my cool and replied in a tiny note back to my friend, "I think he's cute too." And really the rest is history. Our first date was the 8th grade formal and we officially started dating 2 days later. We have been together ever since.
By the time we started talking about marriage it wasn't that big of a deal. We both new we were going to spend our lives together and now it was just a formality. After 7 1/2 years together he managed to surprise me with his proposal.
We began the wedding planning process which was made much more difficult by the fact that at that same moment in time we were graduating from college, planning a month long back packing trip through Europe and arranging for our relocation from Minnesota to Louisiana. The wedding really took a back seat because it just didn't seem like a big deal compared to everything else that was going on.
We were engaged 10 months and the entire time I really down played the wedding and our future marriage in my mind. After all how different could it be? We already knew each other so well. We moved to Baton Rouge, Louisiana in August and our wedding was in October.
So we even had a few months to figure out how to coexist peacefully. By the time October 10th rolled around I was seeing this whole she-bang as more of a nuisance than anything. We had to fly back to Minnesota, get married and fly back in less than a week.
The night before our wedding brought on something we had not expected. Snow! I had checked the Farmer's Almanac for the 100 year history of October 10th and never saw any snow. It has predictably been in the 70's for years. We have a pattern of bringing oddities and natural disasters wherever we go. (The BP oil spill happened when we lived in Louisiana and the largest wild fire in american history happened when we lived in New Mexico and that's only the short list.)
So this snow was worrisome, but nothing we couldn't handle. Unfortunately the next day dipped into the 30's and we had a white wedding. Literally. We had to make do, but for the first time, I was really excited about this wedding thing. Before I walked down to see Adam for the first time I actually choked up. Me! The non-cryer started tearing up. I walked down to my soon-to-be husband and he looked miraculous! I don't know how to describe it, but honestly it was as if the love was just pouring out of him.
We both cried during the ceremony. I remember this overwhelming feeling of "Finally! I am united with my soulmate. We are one." We walked to the back of the church as everyone clapped and we both broke down. We held each other's faces in our hands, looked into each other's eyes and for a very brief moment the world was perfect. We were married after 8 1/2 years together. Now we could start our lives. Nothing else mattered, but that very moment.
We spent the rest of the evening within an arms reach as we danced the night away. And that's where I'll stop describing the details of the night. ;) The next morning we woke up as husband and wife already late for our gift opening. We made a mad rush to get there and once it all settled down again I noticed something. I felt different. I actually felt married.
I know some of this was that honeymoon phase and the lovey-dovey-ness of the day, but I really did feel different. I looked at this man who had been my boyfriend for so long and now saw my husband. That meant something to us and it all felt different. The feeling was short lived, because Adam caught the nasty flu bug that was going around. We managed to get his sick self back to Louisiana to start our life together, but that feeling didn't go away. Just 2 months into it this is how I described my new husband.
We have now been together almost 12 years and married for 3. I've had many people ask me about our relationship since it's not common to start dating at 14. And oddly enough I've had a lot of people ask me my view on marriage. They ask if it is any different than when we were dating. And every single time I can give them a confident. Yes!
Yes it is different. It's harder, more wonderful, more lively, more secure and more amazing than our dating life ever was. But the biggest and most awesome part of being married is looking over at him during our hardest times and our best times knowing that he will be with me forever. It gives me so much strength. No matter what life throws our way we know that we will always have each other. And THAT is why marriage feels so different.
Congratulations Meg! You are about to know exactly what I'm talking about.
If this wasn't mushy enough for you check out these three posts. 10 Years, 11 Years, 3 Years Down.
And if you want EVEN more here is my original post about Our Wedding.